Can You Friend Zone An Ex

Maria Garcia
• Sunday, 03 January, 2021
• 11 min read

This post will show you how to stay out of the friend zone with your ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend. Note: This information is relative to you if your ex is reaching out to you, wants to see you, or if you are required to interact with your ex.

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It’s often I hear from a coaching client of their concern that they’ll end up in the friend zone with their ex. I’ve received a lot of requests to make a video about this and so it’s been on my list for a while.

I’m going to give you some important information on staying out of the friend zone with your ex so that you don’t make it much more difficult to get him or her back. If you want to get your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend back, you shouldn’t be friends with them because it gives them the easiest breakup experience possible.

If they break up with you, they need to feel and notice your absence and the disappearance of all the good things you brought to their life. They need to experience separation anxiety and that can ’t happen if you are still hanging around them and communicating with them as their friend.

So many times people who don’t want friendship will act like a friend around their ex after a breakup. That means that you don’t act bitter, cold, angry, or uninterested IF they reach out to you.

If your ex treats you like you are only a friend and that there is no physical or emotional chemistry, then you should temporarily refuse their future invites getting together. You might give them two or three chances but after that, if they stand firm in their desire to put you in the friend zone, you must refuse getting together with them.

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He or she is not flirting back with you, is turning away from your kisses, and otherwise acting as though there is no longer any romantic or sexual chemistry between the two of you. This would come in the form of flirty texts, messages, or phone conversations where your ex responds to your flirting by themselves being flirtatious and playful.

That does NOT mean that you violate boundaries or do anything inappropriate of course, but ideally you would act as though you see through your ex and doubt that friendship is all they want with you. I have a great video about this in my Emergency Breakup Kit where I guide you with examples of how to do this.

The key is to paint a picture for your ex, reminding them of the great romantic times the two of you shared without being obvious that you are wanting them to remember and have an emotional and/or physical response. I realize that after a breakup most people desperately seek the comfort of the relationship being fully restored, complete with the title of boyfriend and girlfriend.

So apply the principles of this post and the video above to stay out of the friend zone with your ex. Or they are worried they will basically be turned into a Platonic friend who they sip lattes with and gush about the new person that they’re dating.

They worry they could turn into a eunuch with no romantic charm to their ex, whatsoever. The truth is that you probably don’t need to re-attract your ex unless you’ve gone through a massive physical change of some sort.

friend zone friendzone story let wedding been zoned funnypicsonly already
(Source: funnypicsonly.com)

Unless you gained or lost a significant amount of weight, were in a horrible accident with a wood chipper, or went through a very substantial personality break where before you led your ex to believe you were a normal person, but they later found out that you actually had a secret family they didn’t know about, then you do NOT need to worry about re-attracting your ex. Your ex has already decided that you are an attractive, sexy, and very desirable person.

Unless you physically changed in a very dramatic way (I’m not talking about gaining or losing five pounds here). It’s just that there are all of these negative emotions, baggage and history that the two of you shared together because you were in a relationship.

It doesn’t matter if you turn the attraction up to 11 on a scale of 1 to 10. The friend zone doesn’t really exist when it comes to people who have been in a relationship together and then broke up for any number of reasons.

If you were just crushing on this girl or this guy over here and the two of you never dated and never were in a relationship with each other, then that person might have put you in the friend zone. They still feel that attraction for you like I was telling you before, but it’s being blocked by what happened when the two of you were in a relationship and by what you said or did.

What you need to do is to remove that baggage, the block that is stopping the attraction that already exists between the two of you from bringing you together and forming a loving relationship, which is what attraction naturally does anyway. You focus on building high-quality interactions so that toucan come together again and feel attracted to each other and emotionally close again.

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Just focus on having high-quality, emotional interactions with one another that will bring the two of you back together. Here’s the reason so many people get stuck in the friend zone after a breakup, and end up suffering the negative consequences: at first, it seems like a great idea.

If you’re the one who initiated the breakup, or if you’ve come to realize that a permanent separation from your ex is wise, then being “friends” is unwise for one simple reason: it will cause at least one of you unnecessary emotional turmoil and heartache that can be avoided. Whether that happens immediately doesn’t really change things, because the best way to move on from someone is to completely remove them from your life.

Obviously the former option will make the entire breakup process less painful on an emotional level, and will help you move on more quickly. In other words, if you want to survive the breakup and move on as quickly as possible, entering the friend zone with your ex is pretty much always counterproductive.

To begin with, you’ll face all the problems I mentioned above: the experience will be more painful, and it will take longer for you to get over your ex. If you’re unlucky enough to fall into this category, then all you’re achieving by agreeing to be friends with your ex after the breakup is increasing your emotional suffering and making the process of moving on more difficult than it needs to be.

Problem #1: Being friends won’t give you a chance to develop feelings of nostalgia and to miss you as much as if you aren’t around. As I explained in my article on how to get your ex back, one of the key ingredients to repairing a relationship is allowing enough time to pass that your ex begins to miss you like crazy.

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Simple: disappear from their life suddenly and completely, shutting down all lines of communication. Another key to winning back your ex is to make it clear that you are still equals, even if they decided to break up with you.

You need to make it known that you’re not a pushover and that if your ex isn’t interested in a romantic relationship, then they’re cut from your life altogether. You have to make it absolutely clear to your ex that if they choose to break up with you, they’re on their own, and they can ’t come running back to you if they find the single life less fun than they’d imagined it would be.

By stating in no uncertain terms that you’re not going to be sticking around when your ex decides to bail on your relationship, you’re telling them that you’re not wiling to be their “plan b” ; you have dignity and pride and are worth being someone’s “number 1”. If I’ve managed to convince you that being friends with your ex is an awful idea, then you may be wondering how to go about saying ‘no’ to your ex when they suggest friendship after your breakup.

Saying that makes a clear stand on the issue without slinging any mud or closing the door to a possible future reconciliation. You want to make sure there’s no ambiguity or confusion over the issue, but you also want to be polite and diplomatic so as not to start any unnecessary conflicts.

Generally speaking, you want to quickly but subtly reduce the amount of time you spend with your ex (including calls and texts) to zero. Perhaps you and your ex simply kept speaking daily after you broke up, and you feared the idea of losing them completely, so you always replied to his or her texts and agreed when they suggested hanging out.

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If that’s the case for you, and toucan see that you’ve clearly become ‘friends’ since your breakup even though you never actually spoke about it, then it’s time to begin backing out of that situation. Make sure you “already have plans with a friend if your ex proposes doing something together, and don’t be afraid to ignore their calls once in a while.

Brad's #1 best-selling breakup reversal guide, The Ex Factor, has helped more than 130,000 people from 131 countries to re-unite with an ex. Brad’s YouTube channel has over 400,000 subscribers and 50 million views, and he has been featured in a number of well-known media outlets and industry journals.

Where some guys go wrong is by accepting a friendship with an ex woman and then hoping that just by hanging around her and being a good guy, she will miraculously change her mind about him and want him back. You’ve got to actively make her have sexual feelings for you and she will then not want you to remain in the friend zone.

Yet, many guys don’t realize how easy it is to change how a woman feels, so they just listen to her and follow her instructions on only being friends. Hopefully she will see what a good guy I really am for respecting her wishes about just wanting to be friends.

If you put yourself in the friend zone with your ex and only focus on being her nice, sweet, reliable, neutral friend, that’s exactly how she’s going to perceive you. She’s going to look at you as being a friend and will also be sexually turned off by your lack of confidence in your attractiveness to her.

(Source: rememeberlessfool.blogspot.com)

Don’t put yourself in that position where she can destroy you and break your heart some day soon by saying, “MMM… I have something that I need to tell you. Make sure that you are actively triggering her feelings of romantic and sexual attraction for you.

Sometimes a guy will attempt to flirt with his ex, but in the back of his mind he may be thinking, “This isn’t working. If you doubt that your flirting works on a girl, it won’t, because she will sense your self-doubt, which is unattractive to her.

So, what you need to do is flirt with her and believe that it’s working (i.e. it’s making her feel attracted, turned on and sexually interested in you again). When you believe that your flirting is working, your ex will automatically sense your confidence via your body language, vibe, behavior, attitude and conversation style, and it will turn her on because confidence is attractive.

Remember: A woman’s attraction to a guy is based mostly on how he makes her feel when he interacts with her, rather than what he looks like. If you are being confident, self-assured and are making her laugh and smile, she will automatically feel attracted to you and won’t look at you as someone that she wants to keep locked away in the friend zone.

On the other hand, if you are being nervous, self-doubting and insecure when you interact with her, she will automatically feel turned off by you because she will feel more emotionally dominant than you, which means she can ’t fully relax into being a feminine, girly woman around you. Have a relaxed, easy-going confidence in you attractiveness to her and never doubt it no matter what she says or does to try to make you feel insecure.

(Source: rememeberlessfool.blogspot.com)

She stops seeing you as her nice, neutral friend and begins to think, “I’m seeing him very differently all of a sudden. Guys who get friend zoned simply don’t know how to actively attract women during an interaction (i.e. when they are talking to her).

Yet, her attraction is actually a result of her instinctive reaction to various personality traits, behaviors and inner qualities that he is either displaying or not (e.g. confidence, charm, charisma, humor, emotional strength). Most women place way more importance on how a guy makes her feel when he talks to her (e.g.

Yet, when a guy hears that he needs to attract his ex in the ways that she really wants, he sometimes assumes that it means he needs to improve on his physical appearance. Why do you never wear something nice like a suit or at least a pair of trousers and a shirt?” or You really need to get to the gym.

He may then go out and buy new clothes and shoes, get himself a new hairstyle, or go to the gym and workout. In his mind, a woman’s attraction is mostly about a guy’s physical appearance, so that’s what he focuses on.

If you’re serious about getting out of the friend zone with your ex and getting her back, you must improve your ability to attract her based on who you are when you interact with her. Remember: A woman is way more interested in who you are as a person and how that makes her feel when she talks to you, than how you look or what you’re wearing.

going its don even right nz type control
(Source: rememeberlessfool.blogspot.com)

The main thing you need to focus on from now on, is to use every interaction you have with your ex (whether it’s via text, on social media, on a phone call or in person), to re-spark her feelings of sexual attraction and respect for you. The more laughter she experiences when she interacts with you, the more she will associate feeling good with you.

You will be an attractive man in her life again, rather than a lost guy who is hanging around in the friend zone hoping that she changes her mind on her own. When that happens, she will begin to think, “Every time I hear from my ex, he makes me smile and feel good.

Maybe being just friends isn’t what I want after all,” and she becomes open to meeting up with you in person and having sex again. She might not tell you that directly and will instead hint at it and hope that you pick up her signs and then lead the way to kissing and sex.

Constantly play with her hair or a necklace when talking to you in person. Find excuses to get you to come over to her house, or she will just show up at your place.

Bring up past, happy experiences you and her shared together (especially moments in bed). This is why it’s always better to not pay much attention to her potentially confusing signs and just guide the interaction to a hug, then kiss and sex.

(Source: rememeberlessfool.blogspot.com)

Remember: You must be confident when getting a woman back into your bed and into your life, because women are not attracted to the emotional weakness in men. On the other hand, if you confidently make a move when the time is right, she will be happy to hug you, kiss you, have sex and get back into a relationship with you because she will be feeling attracted to your confidence.

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